I now know more about Alt-J
They’re called – “Joe Newman, Thom Green, Gus Unger-Hamilton and Gwil Sainsbury.”
Inverse snobbery or not bands who feature members called Gwil, or Thom with an ‘H’, or with a double-barrelled surname ARE ALL SHIT.
“Alt-J – whose name comes from the shortcut for the delta sign on a Mac keyboard – looked less like pop stars and more like recent graduates as they accepted their award with thanks to their parents and “team Alt-J”.
Where to fucking start? What is more repellant and better evidence of their cuntiness and musical irrelevance – the delta sign name or the fact they can’t even be arsed to look like pop stars and think ‘recent graduate’ is an appropriate look for a band? Tossers.
“But despite promises to spend the £20,000 winning cheque on a slap-up meal for their parents – who would have to be shipped in from France, Harrogate, Cornwall and Southampton”
Why not fly ’em all over on daddy’s private jet for a slap up meal in the family pile in Provence?
“The Maccabees gave a solid rock performance”
And they’re cunts too.
“Special applause was reserved for the jazz act Roller Trio, who floored the room with their squawky saxophones and urgent cacophony of sound.”
Glad everyone appreciated their one attempt at listening too challenging music all year.
“Paul Scaife – “Alt-J have some fantastic songs and are controversial enough to make the choice valid.” “
FFS. I’m off to commit genocide.