I suppose I should really post a link to Sophie and The Giants facebook page.
If you’re interested that’s where to go to check them out. You can google them and they have a bit on youtube. I have listened to them a bit before, but maybe I should listen some more…
You know what. I can imagine them on Jools Holland. There’d be the old blues guy who was great 70 years ago and is still the best thing on the programme, there’d be the 90s indie band who made it big because the record buying public are a bunch of utter cunts and churn out the same shit album every three years. There’d be the one slightly edgy young band who are quite interesting, but ultimately pretty average. Then there’d be the old soul singer doing a shit song with that uber-cunt on his fucking piano, and Sophie and The Giants would be there as the young band who could equally appeal to people of my parents generation as those of mine or my own.
Sophie has got a lush voice, I’ll give her that. I quite like many of the guitar tones, but they are far too close to classic rock to meet my approval. Classic Rock is a style of music that came out of satan’s festering love-trumpet in an explosion of stale jizz. I understnad why god would allow pestulence and disease and war as a test for mankind, but the existence of classic rock evidences that god does not exist, because no god could possibly allow it. Does Johnny Winter doing “Jumping Jack Flash” count as classic rock, cos if so there might be one track that’s an exception. But maybe its just his magic hair which tricks the youtuber into liking the music when it is actually appalling? I actually like the bass on Matches too. But I just do not get what the point of this music is, I really don’t. It is so depressing that people would waste their energy like this. I was right, they play Strats. Hendrix was literally the last musician to make a Strat sound acceptable, and whilst he was god even he’s overrated. Not the same god as the cuntish non-existent one who allows pestulence and disease and war as a test for mankind I hasten to add, Hendrix was a different kind of god.
The Giants should all do their hair and clothes like Johnny Winter. That’d be awesome.
Anyway, if this blog is about one thing it is about saying yes to Skinny Girl Diet, and Fugazi, and Spacemen 3 and the Telescopes. And the Pet Shop Boys and Lost and Found, and Death, and The La’s. It’s about reminding musicians that if you want to be mainstream then you’re up against ‘All about that bass’ and ‘Uptown Funk’ which pretty much guarantees you’re gonna look shit in comparison. It is about saying yes to innovation, yes to brilliance, yes to passion. It is about saying no to people who erroneously believe in musicianship. It’s about saying to a band like Sophie and the Giants “go away, look yourselves in a room with the Municipal Waste back catalogue and don’t pick up your instruments again until you have re-invented yourselves.”
This blog is for the sort of people who agree with me. If you disagree with me then please let me know, ideally by posting a comment on this blog. I hope some people read this and get something from it, but if they don’t then so what? It really doesn’t matter, because nothing in life really matters. Or does it, did I just say that without thinking? Perhaps it all matters?
Listening to ‘Lord Knows’ right now I think I can review this so accurately and so quickly. It’s nice enough, which is precisely what makes it so utterly appalling.
No mummy, I’m not fucking about on the internet, I’m doing my homework.